How to become a wonderful Filipina wife

How to become a wonderful Filipina wife

For me there’s no such thing as perfect like being a perfect wife… were all humans and every now and then we commit mistakes and then, everything will be fine eventually. It’s a part of the relationship and its one way or another sign that both of you are striving to make your relationship a better one.

I have a close friend who has been married for 10 years now, with 2 kids, married at the age of 20. 😛

The first 5 years in marriage was a tug-of-war between her and his husband. Not a single day they weren’t fighting to each other. Who gets to do what, and how far, are set during this period. It’s the drawing of “territorial lines” in the marriage.

I should know because she lived with me for almost 3 months during the time she decided to leave. His husband cheated her in the worst possible way. She was punched and kicked in her arms during their worst fights (but was the first and the last). She has destroyed 2 video cameras, one stereo system, two lamps, 2 mobile phones, 1 pager, and many others during their fights. LOL.

Through it all, they both love each other. They wanted to grow old with one another and cannot imagine life without him/her…

Now she’s sharing 10 tips to become a great Filipina wife.

  1. Men are simple minded and still work with their primal instincts. Feed him when he’s hungry, love him when he comes to you, flatter him a bit, take care of his kids, etc… It’s mostly common sense.
  2. Find out what he is getting from his barkada that he is not getting from you… is it the conversation? Do they play billiards? Do they watch movies? Do they like drinking? once you have identified his need for a barkada, you might try to fill a little of it, to move the focus from them to you… e.g. converse more with him, maybe get into billiards as a hobby too, drink with your husband at home (this can lead to a great night of lovin’… hehehe)
  3. Don’t let the sun set on your fight” meaning, finish the fight on the same day, and if need be, apologize (even if it wasn’t your fault, it still takes two to tango…) then discuss what happened later on, when your heads have cooled… explain to him in detail why you got mad… you’d be surprised that the biggest fights are based on the tiniest of misunderstandings, which by the time the fight escalates, both of you would already have forgotten…
  4. Do not pull out “ghosts of the past” as ammunition when you argue or fight with him, and ask him to do the same. What’s in the past stays in the past, and what’s been forgiven should be written off the books. (Unless it’s a repeat offense).
  5. Keep your man HAPPY IN BED. And be creative with your S*X life. This is one of the major causes of men taking on mistresses… but if YOU become his wife AND mistress and S*X-kitten, he may try others, but none will come close to YOU, and every illicit encounter on the side will just solidify that point in his head.
  6. Refrain from nagging too much… men can be thick at times, but nagging is one sure way of driving your man out of the house… use other forms of reminding him… e.g. a love note with a p.s. reminder, include your reminder in sweet whisperings, or lead him to remember by using suggestions, etc…
  7. Thank him once in a while for being the man of the house, for loving your kid, for being so kind, for remembering to do something, etc… The small stuff counts a lot.
  8. Hold his hand, embrace him when you can, have group hugs with your kid and spouse, go on romantic dates with him, dance with him, flirt with your husband, talk to him in a quiet place (e.g. bedroom) and expose your wants, your fears, your dreams with him.
  9. Apart from all that I have said above, DO NOT LET HIM STEP ON YOU. You are equal, and must remain such for your relationship to grow.
  10. Most importantly, PRAY with him.

In my case, I don’t normally go with number #3. Because when I am into fight, I don’t listen very well, I judge, and decide at that moment instantly. Hehe… So, I guess one should allow time to cool down everything.

By the way, I wanted to share my very-own effective technique in dealing a marriage fight – seduce your husband, do a BJ or something new in bed. And after that, fight is all GONE. haha!

Please feel free to share your tips too, on how to become a wonderful Filipina wife. Cheers!